You and only you...

The days go by slowly, when you wish the day were over, and they fly when your having fun.But the years fly by faster,  the older you get. One day your young and feel like you will live forever, then you realize as time goes by, life is fleeting. Your tomorrows are yesterdays that you let pass you by.  Be more spontaneous if you can, enjoy your life. Not  just when your on vacation or at an appointed time. Laugh whenever you can. Do things that make you happy, sometimes make it about just you, its okay. The world will not end if you do something for yourself. Be kind to yourself and others will also. Emphasis on the word kind. I never said anything about being selfish, that will never make you happy, believe me, I have seen that and it is an ugly thing to witness. Even when that is all the person has ever known, take it upon yourself to be the one who enlightens that person you see being that way, that it is not okay to be that way with you and in your life. Show them through your actions and the way you treat them. If they are of the slow variety, kindly and tactfully so that they don't feel like your judging or attacking them,  let them know that life is alot better when they leave their old ways. Thinking of others more than just themselves all the time. Helping them to see that change is good. We all change every day. Some of us more than others. That is what life is about, learning every day, growing and changing. I am nowhere near the same person I was twenty years ago. We live, we learn, we change and become who we are today. Through our lives and experiences, we can grow to be the person we always dreamed we could be. Believe- that you can do anything that you put your mind to. That is the first step and sometimes the hardest. You can do anything that you believe is possible, reach down inside where you keep that strength and willpower and unleash it. Be your own biggest fan.  But the same goes for the people in your life, if you do things for others, it can make you happy. You don't have to be a doormat, just make a difference. 

Know that whatever you are doing for someone, no one else can do it just like you. 

If you  don't get happiness from what your doing, change your focus to something else, 

or someone else who appreciates your efforts. One person will take you for granted and another 

 will be forever grateful for you. Even in  the smallest things, you can find satisfaction, take baby steps. 

You had to crawl before you could walk, right?  But ultimately, it is up to you who 

 you spend your life with, who you give your help and love and gifts to. It is your choice who will bring you happiness and who is lucky enough to receive the unique gift of you every day. Changing their lives for the better, making them smile and laugh. Being truly happy and sharing happiness and fulfillment.

 Don't look at being happier as a future event that you have to plan for. Make it happen, take baby steps and before you know it,your happy and when your happy, the people who love and care about you are happy also. My father always told me: You and only you can decide what makes you happy. If you aren't happy, only you can change it and if you are happy, don't let Anyone, even yourself, stand in the way of your happiness. I have taught my children this and it has helped me to find my own happiness. And the weirdest thing is that,  it's usually YOU, that stands in the way of your own happiness.

 You may have been taught you aren't worthy of happiness or that only with great sacrifice, then and only then,  can you find true happiness, bullcrap! That's what I say. I find happiness in every moment that I can. But I don't need a fireworks show,etc. to find it. Let the simple things in and around your life bring you that happiness, because you know what, TADAAA!!! that's life. You woke up today, smile! There are a lot of people that didn't. You got to see your family and friends today, even when they don't bring rainbows and hugs, be thankful. Some of us will never see some of our family and friends again until we leave this world. Just like I have always said when explaining a tragedy or life experience to someone that hasn't lived through it. I can tell you my story and what I felt and went through to survive it, but unless you have been there, felt it, survived it, you can't truly understand my pain or what I went through. You see the understanding in the eyes of those who have had similar experiences, but they aren't you. Every moment we live, even sharing your daily lives with others, they will take things from life and events that are similar, and completely different, at the same time. You see and live and perceive as only you can. We are all human, and therefore, share similarities, but in the end, you are one of a kind baby! No one will see, feel or do things exactly like you, thank goodness, what a boring place this would be. Others can see things through your story, the way you saw it and lived it ,but you own it. It's your life and circumstances that have shaped you and made you who you are. Those things have made you stronger, you survived it, your here to tell the tale, grow from what you have been through, learn from your past but don't live in it. Know that, nothing is ever certain or guaranteed. You can make today better for you, and in the process, maybe others, if they are lucky enough to be a part of your life. Don't let anyone tell you that you can't, who the heck are they? Like my dad told me all the time, and I tell my children, (I think Eleanor Roosevelt started it), nobody can make you feel inferior, unless you allow them to. Don't give others permission to treat you badly, or feel like you are less than what you know you are inside. You don't have to freak out on others that upset or mistreat you, but you can speak your mind, stand up for yourself and let them know, it's Not okay to be that way to you, because you will not stand for it.  Love yourself, respect yourself and be happy as much as you can, and the rest of the world will just have to fall in line. What choice do they have if you are the master of your

universe, the captain of your ship, the leader of your life. They have to go through you to cause damage and you won't allow it because you and only you make that decision every day. You may let others influence you and think you are tied  to a certain way things should be, but that's only because, you and only you have made this choice, to ultimately, be where you are and do what you do. Free will- we all have it. Great history has been written about it, wars have been fought for it, and we all carry it with us. It is your own personal power.

 Surprise yourself with it, use it when you need that burst of strength to walk away from someone or  something that is making you unhappy. Turn around and walk away, free will, it is yours to use freely. You chose, of your own free will, to not be unhappy one moment longer. You can also use it to help motivate you to the positive things in life. Learn a new language, write a book, cook instead of going out or, (____fill __in ___the blank___)whatever you want.(Free Will)

Chose to go for a walk, when you think you should be doing some other tedious task in your life that will be there when you get back from your walk, just do it.  But this day, in your life, can never be recovered. Yes, maybe, there will be another day like today, but Think about this. When was the last time you watched a sunrise or a sunset? Have you ever? I asked myself that a few months ago and I was shocked when I thought about when, was  the last time I watched a sunrise. That is just my example. You have to relate it to your life. But ask yourself, when was the last time you took the time to do such a simple thing that you love. What day or year or age, are you going to find your strength and do the things that you have talked about? The things that are yours alone, that you have never shared with anyone else, that you told yourself you would do? You and only you can answer these questions. Make today the day you start living in this very moment, life, right now. Believe in yourself and find that willpower you have and use it to make your life what you want it to be.

 Be the best you possible and grab for your happiness.

 You and only you can do it.